Garfield and Napoleon: The Historical Crossover You Didn't Ask for is a half-hour movie randomly made due to the pain of the producers.
Here we have the most stupid, nonsensical and idiotic crossovers your eyes will ever see. Embrace yourselves for absolute hell.
*Before the main plot, here's a sketch*
LET'S HAVE A WAR.
In this area of Austria-Hungary lives some Serbs and Bosnians who hated living in Austria-Hungary. So the Austrian-Hungarian Archduke Franz Ferdinand goes there for a nice drive in an open-top car, with his car's route published in advance. And that went just about as well as you'd expect. Some assassins were waiting for him along the way and threw bombs at his car but they missed, and blew up some officers behind them instead.
So the Archduke goes into hiding, leaves Sarajevo and the whole war never happens. EXCEPT NO.
world war i started?
Doctor: Okay, Mrs. Bonaparte, this is it. One last push and we're done.
*Letizia Bonaparte gives birth to Napoleon*
Doctor: Congratulations! It's a general. *rumbling noises* Oh, and here comes the rest of the army now.
Letizia Bonaparte: Uh, did you just say the rest of the ar—
*everyone screams in pain as french music plays in the background*
(The crossover WE didn't ask for title screen)
History is full of great conquerors, and so as crossovers. Many with very impressive origin stories. For example, Alexander the Great was the son of a king. Julius Caesar came from an aristocratic family that descended from a goddess. Great conquerors don't usually come from relatively insignificant families living on impoverished islands, but as it just so happens, that is where our story begins. *ding* In the early 18th century, the island of Corsica was a part of the Republic of Genoa until one day Corsica said,
Corsica: Hey. We're declaring independence and it's probably not worth your time to try and stop us.
And Genoa Said.....
Genoa: You're right, it isn't worth our time. Hey France, you want to buy this island?
And France Said.....
France: SUUUUUUUUURRRRREEEEE THING! *Conquers Corsica*
Corsica: Sufferin' Succotash.
And thus, Corsica became a part of France just in time for Napoleon to be born French. Napoleon: (Stewie accent) OoOoOoOo! Look at me! I'm Dad! I wear powdered wigs and silver-buckled shoes, and I'M A TRAITOR TO THE CORSICAN PEOPLE! Napoleon's Dad: Go to your room, Napoleon!
Napoleon: No, YOU go to your room, Dad!
Napoleon's dad: (sadly) ok
*Stalin appears out of nowhere*
Napoleon and his Dad: You don't belong in this timeline
Stalin: WE don't belong in this timeline
On the other hand, Napoleon adored his mother, who was definitely the disciplinarian of the family. And even though she would punish Napoleon severely, he kind of respected that. But Napoleon's parents wanted the best for their family. And since they were a very minor nobility, they were able to have Napoleon sent off to the shining lights and rat-infested sewage puddles of the big city. Napoleon went to military school in France. Teacher: Okay, Napoleon. Why don't you introduce yourself to your new classmates?
Napoleon: Well, I'm Napoleon and I hate all of you. Your farts smell like cheese, you can't pronounce the letter "R," all you do is go on strike, and you call eggs "OEUFS" like a bunch of big dumb, idiot, dingleberries.
Teacher: Uhhh... OK! Uh, thanks, Napoleon. I hope you like being bullied.
*Garfielf's time* Garfield was born on June 19, 1978, in the kitchen of Mamma Leoni's Italian Restaurant to his mother and his unnamed father, weighing 5 lbs and 6 ounces at birth. He has loved lasagna since the day he was born, and it has always been his favorite food ever since, unlike the majority of his family, even his parents, who were rodent preying "mousers". The restaurant owner of Mamma Leoni's Italian Restaurant had to choose between keeping Garfield or closing down his restaurant due to a lack of pasta, so Garfield was sold to a pet shop. On the same day as his birth, Jon Arbuckle came to the pet store and had to choose between Garfield, an iguana, and a pet rock. On November 14, 1978, comic strip, Jon quoted, "I love cats. I wanted a cat... So what do I do? I go to the pet store and ask for a cat. What do they give me?... A lasagna with fur and fangs."
But don't be interested in that, because the main big guy here is Not a fat stupid cat. He created the Beyalandics with Napoleon, and they went to full-on Civil War later on. His name is Jon Arbuckle.
But how did a random comic about an obese, orange, disgusting cat crossover with such a powerful, and much more realistic, tyrannic, actual person? Don't ask how.
But, as Mr. Cartoonist Man put it himself "An imagination is a powerful tool. It can tint memories of the past, shade perspectives of the present, or paint a future so vivid that it can entice... or terrify, all depending upon how we conduct ourselves today". So we can do whatever the actual heck we want.
(NOTICE: THE VIEWS REFLECTED ON JIM DAVIS' SPEECH WERE SAID IN 1989, SO AFTER ALL THOSE YEARS, THE LIABILITY AND THE THOUGHTS OF WHAT HE SAID, HE MAY OR MAY NOT REGRET IT TODAY, OR WILL REGRET IT LATER ON, EVENTUALLY OR NEVER, DEPENDING ON HOW HE CONDUCTS IT IN THE PRESENT, THE FUTURE, OR THE PAST. THE LONELY IDIOTS WE CALL THE PRODUCERS HAVE ABSOLUTELY NO RESPONSIBILITY OVER ONE'S THOUGHTS AND FEELINGS, EXCEPT FOR THY VERY OWN BELIEFS AND POSTULATION. THIS IS A NOTICE FOR ALL THE WARNING SCREEN NERDS).
(Now, back to the daily program)
Now what was i talking about? oh, that's right.
So anyway, we are going to discuss about Jon Arbuckle, The Man, The Myth, The Legend. Also the Idiot.
Jon met with Napoleon after being upset and desperate about not finding a woman for a date. At this time, the French Empire was at war with the Free State of Indiana, Jon lives in Muncie, and the French forces had just seized Fort Wayne.
The reason Napoleon came over to Jon's was because Napoleon was gonna guillotine Jon, as a form of execution (Got dark fast)
But, he was so stupid and desperate that he spared him. After that, Jon said some, rather interesting things...